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The Prosecution: Her View

Whenever Axel fails to wear something I've presented him, I experience upset. Purchasing items is my method of showing I care

I genuinely appreciate selecting things for my partner, Axel. It's about caring; I feel thrilled whenever I spot something that makes me think of him.

I specifically like to get him clothes – I think it provides him a little confidence boost. Although I already like his personal style, it's my approach of showing I care.

I earn a higher salary than him, so it's not a big deal to buy him items. I understand some individuals don't express love through items, but if I have the means, what's the harm?

However when he doesn't wear something I've presented him, particularly after I've given consideration into it, I experience hurt.

During summer, I purchased him a couple of denim pants. Yet I observed he wasn't wearing them, and questioned if he liked them.

He walked down the subsequent day sporting them, saying: "Look, I've got your jeans on!" This caused me feeling foolish.

It seemed as if he was merely sporting them since I had inquired. Part of me felt happy, but on the other hand felt as if he was behaving to quiet me.

I don't anticipate him to sport everything immediately or to perform thanks, but when time elapse and I never notice him putting on my presents, I begin to wonder if he appreciated them in the first place.

I want him to appear his optimal – so, yes, I have thoughts about what suits him.

One time, I attempted to get rid of his footwear. I can't stand them. Axel got very annoyed. Perhaps I overstepped a somewhat.

He claimed I was trying to erase his character, but I hadn't. I simply wished him to understand what I perceive: that he could look amazing if he enhanced his outfits somewhat.

He has got great fashion sense when he desires to, and I get annoyed when he continues with the same few outfits out of custom.

I suppose that's due to the fact that he lacks as much concern in clothing as I do and lacks as much funds to spend in his outfits.

Yet, from my end, sometimes it's not about the outfits at all; it's about desiring to feel that my actions are valued.

I appreciate that Axel is independent and determined; it's part of what defines him. But I furthermore desire he'd see that when I get him things, I'm simply attempting to bond with him.

The Other Side: Axel

I was unattached so long I'm not used to individuals buying me things – and I dislike receiving instructions what to do

I think my girlfriend's habit of buying me things and then growing frustrated when I don't wear them is problematic.

Not anyone should be pressured to use a gift whenever the donor desires. That detracts from the purpose of a gift, which is intended to be generous.

Concerning the pants, I only hadn't had around to sporting them as it was quite warm this period.

But when she asked if I liked them, I sported them the exact following day.

Bella subsequently accused me of merely sporting them to appease her, which was somewhat true. But my perspective is: don't request me to wear a piece you purchased and then accuse me of not truly wishing to sport it.

That scenario makes sense.

I ought to be free to select when to wear my garments. Bella is being quite thoughtful when she purchases me gifts, but I don't want sensing pressured.

She said I was ungrateful when I brought this up, but it's genuinely different.

My girlfriend additionally receives a much more funds than me, and it isn't a significant issue for her to splurge on new items.

Yet I am without that multiple garments, and I'm used to putting on the identical clothes. It takes me a little while to adapt to owning new things in my clothing collection.

I'm likewise unfamiliar with people getting me things, as this is my initial partnership. There's likely also a little of me being determined.

If my girlfriend attempted to get rid of my footwear, I failed to respond positively.

I actually enjoy the jeans she purchased me, but occasionally if she has a great thought, my immediate response is to decline to follow it, just because I've been alone for so extensively and I dislike getting directions what to undertake.

My girlfriend has additionally noted this tendency in me, and I know I need to work on it.

Nevertheless, conversely of me questions whether Bella is buying me things because she's {trying|attempt